By Amanda Stowers, and Matt Fisher
People of Earth, my name is Loremaster Lilith of the celestials. I know you are all confused, but be assured that despite the tense circumstances under which you were brought on board the celestials have the best interests of humankind at heart. This vessel, the Ark, is on its way to the planet Eridanus VII where together we will build a new home and prepare you to participate in intergalactic civilization. In time we will teach you to navigate the careful balance that keeps our galaxy at peace. I know these are trying times — my beloved human disciple has been murdered and Maintainer Uriel has failed to sustain the Ark’s systems. But in a few moments we will arrive at your new home where with our assistance all the troubles of humanity’s checkered past will be washed away as you work towards a new beginning. Now please return to your habitats while we make final preparations for landing.